The first chapter of the blog was written as nothing more than a rambling of thoughts after another (in a series) of steps that I have to take to protect myself from someone who harmed me. I never meant it to be anything more than a rant against the justice system and how difficult it is to be protected by the laws as technology is moving faster than new legislations regarding domestic violence offenses.
I wrote the blog, meant only for myself, and accidentally hit the “Publish Now” button. I didn’t realize I had done this until about 10 minutes later when my Facebook account was bombarded with comments from my friends who saw (because Facebook announced it) the link and read it. I was encouraged to keep telling the story of that set of circumstances, and how it played out. After that, there were more request to continue to tell the story of not just domestic abuse but of many other forms of neglect and abandonment that have occurred in my life.
I am a reluctant messenger. But, I want to be an obedient one, and I want to make sure that this story, my story, isn’t one thrown around lightly and answered with “name it claim it” cliche answers. It has been my desire, over the last 7 years, to be a good steward of the pain. This blog is an attempt to do that. It is truly a story of healing. I named it “blindsidedbyhealing” because like everybody else, I hate to be blindsided. When you have had a life like mine, you learn to prepare for bad things to happen, and sometimes you expect them.
To say that my healing is a miracle is an absolute understatement. I never dreamed I could live the life I am living, one so full of love; so full of life and so full of opportunity. Healing caught me off guard. It blindsided me. And I am so glad.
I have some concerns about continuing to write. I do not want anybody who reads this blog to think that their pain is less significant than mine. Pain is a condition that we all face at some point–and regardless of where the pain originates, it is your pain, it is your sorrow, it should not be compared to others. One of my favorite verses in the Bible is Romans 8:18 “For I reckon that the sufferings of this world is not worthy to be compared to the glory that will be revealed in us”. Suffering is a universal condition, and as you read of my healing, know that it’s possible for you too. There will be days when it won’t feel like that to you, but remember we are promised Grace that is so sufficient for you; and strength that is made perfect in weakness.
We are nearing the story, and as I finish it I realize that this labor of love is one of the is an accomplishment, not to be taken lightly. It would be helpful for you to start from the beginning if you are so inclined. My single most goal for this blog is to start a discussion in your circle of influence. Domestic Violence and child-hood abuse is a silent monster; and at some point she will just tell you, and then you can get her help. Maybe my story is just like yours and you can glean some hope from my story.
It is a story of Ridiculous Redemption/Amazing Healing/Strength for Each Moment/Grace For Each Day